Freeform

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A waiter walked up to the table
Wearing a suit jacket that was far too small—
There was no way he could button it, and the
Sleeves came halfway up to his elbows
He sported a overlarge red bow tie
Black curly hair with oil in it, and
A large, obviously fake mustache
Which curled in waxed spirals at the ends.

“May I take your order, please?” he asked.

Before we could answer
A nude woman holding a pomegranate, with a
Bayoneted rifle slung over her shoulder
And flanked by two huge yellow and black tigers
Complained that she had been stung by a bee
And wanted her money back.

We sat for eleven minutes waiting
Then realized that ants were eating the silverware

He married some Sugar
The old coffee bean did
On a wild weekend in Mexico
Laying promiscuously with Vanilla
After binge drinking
Clear grain alcohol.

They had a love child
And they called her Kahlua
Which sounded far more Hawaiian
Than it did Spanish
But what did they know?
They were drunk.

Woke up, got out of bed,
Logged in to see what email said.
Walked down the hall to get a cup,
And looking up, I noticed it was late.
Got my coat, and grabbed my keys,
Drove to the store to buy blank CDs.
While in line, found I was broke,
Someone told a joke, and I went into a dream…

I felt the muse today, oh boy.
One-thousand words I’ve got jotted down.
And though the words, they made me sad,
I just had to laugh…
They equaled one photograph.


– Posted from my iPhone

My Love, for you I tell
The words my heart doth sing:
In pastel harmonies and
Tribal jungle rhythms
High angelic notes amid
Low animal growling
Every note and utterance
Tells the same tale…
A thank you to the Creator
For bringing you into my life

I love you.

You killed my child
You drunken son of a bitch
You drove, you swerved
And you killed me with her

I will smite you
I will smite you all
In this war I will spread my pain
Across all barriers
I will go above and beyond my cause
I will wreak havoc with
The entire fucking world

I will make it so your crime
Is the crime of all crimes
I will make it so illegal
That you can’t even think about it
And if you dare speak it
You will be smote with the same fury
As if you were behind that wheel

My pain will remove your freedom
My loss will stifle your free will
No one will dare stand in my righteous way
No one will dare point out
That I have gone far too far

My grief has given me the power
That only an army of zealots can know
I have right on my side
This truth will smother all other truths
Until only it remains
And you will rot in Hell
All of you — down here deep, with me
Me and my pain

She has the most beautifully rounded font
I have ever beheld
And I caress every curve
Of her W
With my eager gaze
Her M and her Y
Give me a capital I
Even her E and her 3
Really do it for me
She has the most beautifully rounded font
It is my favourite.

High pitched giggling
Tiny hands grabbing my hair
Says “silly daddy!”

Little
Darling redhead
I ask for permission
To marry your mother, please
Say yes

I will
Make you pancakes
And watch cartoons with you
Curled up on a big comfy couch
With mom

You silly daddy
You already are married
You and my mommy

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